Lady Antebellum - need you know

only if you understood..
Its a quarter after one and I'm all alone and I need you now..

Puzzle

I can feel the peaces falling

I feel the water rising to my neck

Haven't been blogging for awhile, but I was hoping it would a happy be one, but unfortunately its not. I'm tired of of the drama that life has to offer. unnecessary drama that some how still managed to finds its way to me. Alot had been going on recently, Love, friendship and school is coming at me like an endless wave of cold water. I can feel the unbearable wet water beneath my feet as it starts to rise up and eventually engulf me whole. My love of my life the only love that I have is slowly shattering to pieces. Its like a puzzle that was carefully put together making sure each piece fits perfectly to make the beautiful whole, this outstanding picture is slowly falling apart. with each piece breaking off slowly and deteriorating the picture down. And soon, what is left? an imperfect and distorted image. No longer able to articulate what this puzzle was and how aesthetically beautiful it once was. In the end, its not what is was but what it is now. A distorted image.

Friendship - oh friendship. Even calling someone a friend is overrated, friends today is not how friends was like back in 2000. Back stabbing, deceptive, deceiving bitches. Running their mouth and manipulative. Friends literally smacking some sense into another, and then arrested. Sluts and hoes I am surround, And I probably is viewed as one, and is probably been called one. These are friends kind but shady. But I still love them.

School - ha school. I was the innocent little boy who walked in ocad with big dreams, focus and ready to start his life as an adult and for sure thought school. Will be his priority, oh how I was so wrong. Why? life gave me my very first lemon. I was = rebound/played. Then again that was just a side. I was determined, mental break downs and stressing. After I knew how uni roll, haha it was all history. My grades are bad, last Minuit homeworking, and overnight stressing. But guess what, I didn't fail and school is almost over. Sham WOW :) lol

breaking

I'm slowly breaking

At the verge of failing

Here I am at 7:30 in the morning unable to sleep after finishing 2 projects that due today. Laying in bed realizing that Im at the verge of failing this semester. Honestly I had 8 books to read in the english class this semester read only 2. And they were the shortest of the 8. Also realizing that, my drawing classs that I am in, Im at the verge of failing that too. Seriously, Im doing horrible this semester. I think im really going IMA cut the chilling and just do what I gotta do. If I can read atleast 2 books a week, I will be fine. Which I highly doubt it since I get major assignments everyweek for my studios courses.. All I have to say it, FML I didn't even bother editing this Im done, Oh not sleeping today... clearly..

hurt.

this is all I can say.

Feeling like sad cannon in d by yoona hwang

questions

I don't want to let it go but why aren't you giving me reasons to stay? All I ask is for change, is it that hard? All I want is to see is that you try, but why don't I see it? All I want you to do it prove me wrong, so why do you prove me right? Why must you do everything as a reason for me to leave? Why must you make me test you and end up being disappointed? Why do you let me walk away when I choose to leave? Why do you let me cry for you? Why don't you know how to make me happy when I'm sad? Why must I always ask you when you can be with me? Why must I always ask you if your free for the weekend? Why must I answer, he's tired, he doesn't want to out tonight or he can't be with me because he's busy, when they ask "why isn't he here"? Why can't we go on a date, longer than 3 hours? Why do I put in so much to be hurt? Why do I try to hard and while your watching? Why do I commute to you so much for only an hour? Why can't you do what I do for you? Why am I second to everything? Why can't you see though my eyes? Why can't you wipe my tears when I cry? Why do only watch me when I cry? Why can't you make a good excuses even thought its a lie? Why don't you come see me out of trying and not out of convenient? All I want to see is that you try? Did you know I don't want to hear you say, I can't without trying? Did you know that I hate when you say you don't know? Do you know I hate to find out you spend time doing other things like clubbing when you told me you can't be with me? Do you know that excuses are getting old? Why do you tell me your trying and I have to wait? Did you know if theres a will, theres a way? Why do you make me feel that I have such a small portion of your heart? Why am I wanting for you to make a changes? Do you know I can't wait forever? Do you know that I will have to let go someday? Do you know that I can't be that boyfriend forever? Do you know that my tears will run dry?

Why are you doing nothing?

these are my questions.

Imperfections

The images of perfections are slowly deteriorating and fading away. Was there perfection? or was I only believing there was because I was too involved and constantly fighting to create that image of perfection that I desired. Like people say, you can be blinded by your ambition and desire, the green eyed monster of other people's perfections. But then again, breathing the un-fresh air of this contaminated planet had clearly not made me wise enough to notice that theres is nothing perfect in this world, only that mirage that constantly reoccurs into our minds that happens to be the motivation as human beings. But then again who am I to make such a statement of perfections and imperfections. My experience and knowledge? Either way, in this situation, it takes two to make perfection

Stevie Hoang - Changes lyrics
tryna take it back to the way it used to be
it was all good just a weak ago
now im starting to notice a little bit of change (lets go)
it dont take much for rme to make you mad baby
and lately girl it seems like ive been driving you crazy
tell me how we got this way, theres just so much i can take
it feels like we gotta make a change
oh girl, i know i did you wrong in the past
oh girl, i thought we moved on and let it go
but i guess i was wrong, and im tryna be strong
but its breaking my heaart
can we go back to how we used to be
lets work it out cause i dont wanna leave
its driving me crazy, im missin my baby
can you tell me whats changed
can we go back to how we used to be
girl it seems like you wanna turn your back on me
its driving me crazy, im missin my baby
can you tell me whats changed
its like the situations going from bad to worse
and now it seems like everything i do just aint good enough
hey, i do my best to make it work
but you know we cant keep goin on this way, baaby
oh girl, i know i did you wrong in the past
oh girl, you know i (pledge?) us so many times
and now i dont know, if i should go
cause i dont want to do this no more
you know things just arent gettin better
baby we gotta make it right
girl i aint even sure if we'll ever
get back to the way we were
and im not gonna play, like everythings alright
we've been through to much to let it go
baby i just wanna know
can we start over again (yeaaah)

the life of of a monkey

Jugo Juice
Fell in love with jugo juice after the first drink :) absolutely love this place, I'm determined to try everything on the menu, but today was the first time getting a nasty one, don't ever try the buzz smoothies ugh nasty (strawberry buzz this discusting).

What else.. hmmm.. quannie got me the cardigan I wanted >.<" ( they were the one where we got into a fight and I didn't end up buying it.) Heart you. Your so wiped MUAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA Im joking PEW PEW PEW


OOOuuuu I also join Xtreme Fitness today with quannie... Getting that sexy beach body this summer for sure.. : ) Finally quannie can lose some weight, hes getting so fat from my excellent culinary skills BOOYAKA, but yeah, who's in the area and wants to try out, I can bring guest so request me : ) But yeah you'll see the sexy henry in 2 months : )

Tiffany&co

Here I am, 4 o'clock in the morning surfing Tiffany's website. After napping early and now unable to get back to sleep. Been searching for a necklace at Tiffany for awhile and realize that they have ugly and limited design for men. Who wears dog tags these days? So I've come to realized that a unisex looking necklace are the way to go. Its either the typical bar necklace Or something a little more daring like The only thing is I'm alittle iffy about buying expensive Jewelry for myself. Yes I do spend alot of money on other different and useless things like, my R7R jeans and Trues, which like 10 of them don't even fit now -.-" My point being is that I rather have Quannie buy me on, it more sentimental that way, and which I might not get bored of. But then again, you can never have too much jewelry/accessories. I guess they'll last longer than my jeans.